Sing a Long with me (What's your Guess)

A well known fact I work in a nursing home, many of my residents are over the age of eighty. One thing they enjoy is the sing along sessions. They jump on the bandwagon when 'Saints go Marching In' is sung, "my Country tis a thee', "Always" etc. I started thinking, really thinking. Holy Cow! When I get older, what will be my sing a long. Seriously, what would be my generations sing a long songs. When my generation is sitting around, eighty, can you see a piano player coming in, and all of us, singing in a bubbly manner, 'Shot to the heart and you're to blame . . .'

GIve it some serous thought for a sec. What do you think your generations sing a long songs will be?

Disaster 333

First, let's establish fact. A new resident came to the home, checking into rom 333. She weighs in at 523 pounds.

Ok, last week, there was a horrible storm. Torrential downpours. I go into the office, I'm sitting at my desk, the supervisor at hers, and the new woman. We hear pat, pat, pat. Huh? I turned. What's that dripping?

At that instant,. no sooner did I say it, SPLASH! down comes the suspended ceiling tiles, and with it, a flood of water. I mean it was like a water fall. It careens down upon the supervisor and her desk, she's drenched.

"holy shit!" I said.

The new woman, slightly ditzy said, "Wow, it must be raining hard."

"Uh, yeah, it's Noah and the flood, because we're on the second floor. There's a whole floor above."

While the supervisor is in shock and soaking wet, I run upstairs to see the cause.

Eek. Here, the 523 pound woman had to urinate really bad, ran to the bathroom, plopped on the toilet and shattered it.

Shattered it.

The flood, the waters that drenched my supervisor . . . urine and water.

And, I'm waiting to hear if there's gonna be an investigation, because they are still pulling porcelain from the 523 woman's behind.

Time of the Meth

I've been at my new job just under two months. A co worker calls me up Saturday, she wrecked her car. Was there anyway on Monday I could help her get to work. She was fine, she turned into a curb and flattened her tires. It was the first Monday I was off since I started working, but ok, sure, I'll be nice. She starts at noon.

She lives about 11 miles away from my house south, and about 6 miles there to work. Sunday I get a call. Would I be able to get her early, at like 930, see she has this 'condition' she tells me, and needs to get to the clinic for pain management.

Hmm. I then recall the conversation my supervisor had with me. That this particular woman was sick.

Feeling bad, I take her. I pick her up Drive not only the 11 miles back north past my house, but another four miles. Then I have to go back another 10 miles in a different direction to work.

This clinic was hopping. I was impressed, thinking its some sort of new age cancer treatment center. I waited outside while she ran in. She apologized for taking long they had to do a urine test.

Before getting her to work, she asks me to stop at the gas station. I'm thinking she wants to put a few bucks in my car. No, she gets smokes. I asked about perhaps some gas money, to which she replies, she is broke.

I tell a friend about this clinic, and he says, "Is that the one by the thrift store. Jake, that's a meth clinic."

What? No wonder it was hopping. To make matters even more complicated, she keeps calling, she wants me to take her everyday until she gets her car back. I told her I couldn't do it, I didn't have the gas money or time, and I gave her a bus schedule. She says she can't take the bus, she doesn't have money and I have to drive her. I have to drive her? Wow, and to top it all off, when I said I couldn't because of time, she said, 'oh, i can just borrow your car and drive you to work'

Hmm

The Time of the Novel

It's sad that some of my friends must bid farewell to the xanga site, but I totally understand why. A lot of posters are here to spam your mail, and get the most feedback as if it is a contest. So I decided to post my blogs also on facebook now, since many of my friends are there.

Ok, been 'wrestling' with it for a while, what to do with information I have in hand. I think I am going to write the book I was supposed to write, but only as a fiction novel.

Why not? It may or may not be a hot topic. But there's some really juicy stuff. I think I have the right angle to take with it. The correct structure. It could be good. It might get me in trouble. Oh, well, what the hell.

The Presidential Invite

I have decided to invite President Obama and others to my karaoke show when they are intown on Sept 24 and 25 for the conference. I figure he may not have plans.

So my plan is A: invite him via email and request a response.

B: Fax,

Seriously, that is my goal. Let's see if I can meet the president. I doubt it, but it's worth a try, right?